Issey Miyake, you are offish my fave human; my fuman.
The first time I laid eyes on these puppies, I think that my heart cried. I felt the tears trickle down into my digestive system via osmosis.
Just look at them. If you don’t like them, then I don’t like you which means that you have now lost two friends: myself and good taste. Which, I understand, is more than 2 people, but it’s a metaphor for how you should stop reading this post as it is of no interest to you.